Final Show for the Ultimate Showman
MJ Funeral -
July 8th, 2009
If you did something super kick-ass – like announcing you’ve discovered a cure for cancer or invented a high-speed super train solely powered by cat piss – in hopes of making the national news yesterday, your timing could not have been worse. No, the only game in town was Michael Jackson’s Memorial service, and rightly so.
Everywhere you looked, logged on or listened Tuesday, it was all about the King of Pop. Performances and speeches made by family and friends hit all the right notes during the somber and celebratory ceremony. Even kooky former kid-actor and reality-TV train wreck Corey Feldman chipped in with a nice holy $h!t moment by showing up dressed just like Jackson.
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$2M
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Cost the city of Los Angeles estimates for the extra police and city services used to handle and patrol the crowd swell for Jackson’s memorial. What’s 2 mil for a guy and a local government who are both half a billion in debt? Could have booked the Hollywood Bowl and had Tito perform. |
I can thrill you more than any ghost who would dare to try.
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Michael Jackson, “Thriller”
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Will he come back from the dead? Is he still alive? That’s not Michael strolling the streets of Cairo or shopping at a Wal-Mart in Arkansas, folks. It’s LaToya.
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promethean [pruh-mee-thee-uh
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1. boldly creative and defiantly original. 2. The model of casket ordered from the Batesville Casket Company for Michael Jackson. Called the Promethean, the casket is solid bronze and plated with 14 carat gold. The same style was used for Jackson’s childhood hero, James Brown.
Gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson had his ashes blasted out of a huge tower fashioned after his logo, a two thumbed clenched fist rising from the hilt of a dagger. As his ashes flew, so did colorful fireworks. A crowd of friends and family looked on and cheered. Yes, but were there free hot dogs?
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So long, Mike! Your music and moves connected the world in ways no other entertainer has or ever will. For that, the freakiness was forgotten for a day, and we all realized the impact you made on us (red pleather zipper jackets notwithstanding).
CORRECTION: In yesterday’s issue, we referred to Roger Federer as a Swede. He’s from Switzerland. Apologies to TTP reader Bjorn Borg. |
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