Mind If I Powder My Nose?
Bernie, Blow, and Babes -
October 23rd, 2009
Normally when you hear about someone ripping a line of blast off a stripper’s pudenda you imagine the members of Motley Crüe backstage on the Too Fast for Love tour. However, if you worked for Bernard L. Madoff Investment Services in the mid-70s, that kind of activity could have easily been part of your morning coffee break. A new lawsuit filed this past Tuesday in New York State Supreme Court alleges that Bernie not only bilked his customers out of billions, he was also banging rails and nailing escorts on his customer’s dime. Who knew weasels partied so hard? Or that the screw-happy scoundrel had such a fun office?
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43%
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Percentage of users that have enjoyed cocaine at a staff party; 20% at a work client function; and 10% before going to work, according to a 2008 study by the National Advisory Committee on Drugs. Wow, we thought America runs on Dunkin’! |
Supply the place of food, make the coward brave, the silent eloquent and … render the sufferer insensitive to pain.
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Pharmaceutical company Parke-Davis’ 1885 statement of intent regarding its cocaine products
You never saw ol’ Doc Baker on Little House on the Prairie dosing up any of the citizens of Walnut Grove with this stuff. |
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Big Swinging Dick
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noun. 1. A slang term for a big-time trader on Wall Street. In more polite circles, the term is shortened to BSD. 2. Term made famous in Michael Lewis’s non-fiction opus, Liar’s Poker, about bonds salesmen in the 1980s. Never heard of it? Read it!
In 2006, six female employees sued investment bank Dresdner Kleinwort for $1.4 billion for allegedly creating an atmosphere hostile towards women. They claimed that male colleagues asked them to leave as they entertained clients at strip clubs and that some employees brought strippers back to the company’s offices. The lawsuit was settled for an undisclosed sum. Stripper take-out? Incredible.
Famous Coke Heads
| Ulysses S. Grant | Became addicted after swabbing the drug on his throat cancer. |
| Sigmund Freud | Claimed the drug had a stimulating effect on the genitalia. |
| Robert Louis Stevenson | Wrote Dr Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde during a six-day coke binge. |
| Yasmine Bleeth | Compared her addiction to falling in love. "It became my boyfriend," she said. |
| Stephen King | Claims coke saved him from alcohol addiction. He’s now drug free. |
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Madoff thought he was above the law in everything that he did. But next to the $51 billion he drained from the pockets of investors… some tits and toot at his office is peanuts. |
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