Archive for April, 2010

  • TTP | The Ultimate Puma (Demi Moore) -- Apr 30th
    In this world of staggering wonder, baffling mysteries abound: Stonehenge, the miracle of birth, and why is Demi Moore with Ashton Kutcher? The list goes on. This month’s Dame We Dig is none...

  • TTP | WTF, TTP!? (Justin Bieber) -- Apr 29th
    Mint juleps at 6:00 AM on Derby Day, free balling in a rented tuxedo, dating a chick named Pandora ... we've been known to do some stupid shit. Today is one of those days. Enjoy! Every five or...

  • TTP | Are You Lonesome Tonight? (Internet Dating) -- Apr 28th
    Bigger bombs, those cool Tide stick pens that get ketchup stains off your shirt, and online dating sites ... Thank you, technology. Used to be that a person would have to shower, get dressed, leave...

  • TTP | Out There (Stephen Hawking) -- Apr 27th
    If your alien invasion contingency plan involves putting out some nice finger sandwiches, a cold pitcher of iced tea, and reciting your favorite dirty jokes in Klingon for said “visitors,”...

  • TTP | For Crying Out Loud (South Park) -- Apr 23rd
    While most Muslims are known for their great sense of humor and c'est la vie attitude, their more extreme brethren tend to get a little testy if so much as a chuckle is heard within ten clicks of Mecca. So...

  • TTP | The Legend Continues (Willie Nelson) -- Apr 22nd
    Sure he’s a singer, songwriter, activist, actor, and pot smoking pig farmer, but that is not surprising for Willie Nelson. What is surprising is that somehow the dude is still pulling off the braided...

  • TTP | Genie In A Bottle (Beer Campaigns) -- Apr 21st
    When it comes to sales gimmicks and marketing techniques, no one has proven to be more adept, visionary, and full of sh*t than our dear friends over at MillerCoors. The new Miller Light Vortex bottles...

  • TTP | You, Me, & Dupré (Ashley’s 15) -- Apr 20th
    If you listen closely, you can almost hear Eliot Spitzer at his local newsstand chuckling and mumbling to himself, “Been there. Done that.” The May issue of Playboy featuring former high-end...

  • you talkin’ to me? -- Apr 19th
    Hola dear roller, Until groceries are free, beer flows from the faucet and Foot Locker hooks us up with complimentary Nikes for filthy jokes, the world will continue to be imperfect. Until then,...

  • TTP | Street Intelligentsia (Banksy) -- Apr 16th
    We all have the need to express ourselves. But sadly, for many, flying a middle finger during rush hour is as clever as it gets. As the population booms and traditional forums to present ideas dwindle,...

  • TTP | Chuck E. Cheats (Sheen Sneaks Around) -- Apr 15th
    For most dudes, pondering an exit from a huge gig, fathering five kids, and hoping to save a third marriage to a crack-addicted wife would be a little overwhelming. But not if you’re Charlie Sheen. No,...

  • TTP | Magic Mushrooms: Coming to a Pharmacy Near You -- Apr 14th
    They’re grown in cow sh*t, aren’t always easy to come by, and after a quick munch, Lewis Carroll’s world becomes your world. Hallucinogenic mushrooms—or rather the psilocybin in...

  • TTP | Amazing Grace (Pope Forgives Beatles) -- Apr 13th
    It looks like the Vatican is getting a bit more expeditious when it comes to exculpation. In just two short years after the Pope forgave John Lennon for declaring that the Beatles were more famous than...

  • TTP | Raise Your Game (Sponsor Tag) -- Apr 12th
    Chicks wear push-up bras and fake eyelashes. Your uncle Dale stuffs his Speedo® with a kielbasa. So why are you still answering to nicknames like “tiny” and “small fry?” Would...

  • TTP | Disengaged (Ring Etiquette) -- Apr 9th
    Next to buying a gas station rubber or an All Beef Big Bite from 7-11, no other purchase in a man’s life is a bigger gamble than an engagement ring. So what happens when you dump mad stacks on a...

  • TTP | Party’s Over in New Haven (Student-Faculty Flings) -- Apr 8th
    If Yale is looking for a new Auto-Shop department head, Jesse James need not apply. Making it easier for the highly decorated “undecided” academics to choose Harvard, Yale has put the kibosh...

  • TTP | Fake Violence Is Brutal Business (Pro Wrestling) -- Apr 7th
    Professional wrestling is a lot like dating Charlie Sheen. Sure, you take your lumps. But with any luck, you get some fame, a few bucks, and bail before any long-term damage is done to your health. Others...

  • TTP | Blue Balls! (Duke Beats Butler) -- Apr 6th
    Hurricane Katrina, the earthquakes in Haiti, Carrot Top’s stand-up career … it is only natural for us to sometimes question the presence of God in our earthly realm, yet faith sustains us. Until...

  • TTP | Say Hello to a Little Kid? (Scarface Viral Video) -- Apr 2nd
    What happens when an established music video director casts 7 to 10-year-olds to re-enact a scene from Brian De Palma’s iconic gangster film, Scarface, then posts the clip? It goes viral faster than...

  • TTP | Swine Me, Dine Me (Before You Die) -- Apr 1st
    We will be running a new feature on the first day of each month that we are calling "Before You Die."  It's like a bucket list, but less cliché than, say, running with the bulls...